- - ASBusinessMagnet introduces the fanfic in a Seriously Written Note
Post-SCrash Session 3: Spectators of the Host is the fifth officially listed trollfic written by ASBusinessMagnet, and the third in the Post-SCrash Session series. It follows Janet Roberts and her friends, such as Cantaloupe and Skepness Man, in their adventures in various epochs of the Marrissaverse.
The story is divided into two major parts, each taking up fourteen chapters. The first chapters in each pair introduce new plot developments (Janet Roberts and co. arrive to the Capitol and Chell Junor Roberts arrives to Portal High School), while Chapters 14 and 28 are twice as long as the rest and tend to be their own self-contained stories (Violet Beauregarde's tour of her chewing gum factory and Skepness Man and Chell Junor's wedding). Interestingly, Violet and the Horrible Fanfic Writer, a story that can be seen as a spinoff tie-in to Spectators of the Host, also has fourteen chapters, and its last chapter is also a self-contained story set in 2013.
Besides the chapters, the story also features three intermissions, as a homage to Homestuck. Intermission 1, named "Skepness Man Blueberry-garde", is set in an alternate universe which Violet had visited, and Intermissions 2 and 3, "Script for Vi Hart" and "Script for Welcome to Night Vale", depict Portal High School and its students and personnel from an outsider perspective.
The story, like the first Post-SCrash Session story, begins with a brief introduction of the main character, Janet Roberts. After the Red Miles arrived, she was taken away by Dick Stiller, along with Roxa Lavigne and Jack London, to the time dubbed "The Severe Forth Hunger Games", in the Games' Cornucopia. Upon pure boredom, she and her friends descend to the underground part of the Cornucopia and hence are separated from each other. Before long, though, Janet is met by Skepness Man, who leads her out to the Capitol, where the colors make her sick and she passes out.
When she wakes up, she is met by Dick Stiller. At this point, Aranna Sorket messages them, effectively transforming them to their "innocuous doubles", Meanie Pixies and Merlin LeJoin. When they are in this form, Skepness Man meets them again and takes them to AG 1980, when Portal High School, run by Principal Business Man, was in its heyday. However, he inadvertently turns them back to Janet and Dick before getting a detention from Principal Business Man and having to leave.
Aranna Sorket, after briefly explaining the deal to Janet and Dick, is messaged by Lately Pirate. Lately often hangs out in Portal High School, but is not registered as its student, warranting Mr. Sanpe, who takes her to detention along with Skepness Man. After discussing various stuff, Lately and Skepness Man leave.
Meanwhile, Janet and Dick briefly meet Avril Lavigne, the mother of Roxa Lavigne. They then are found by Principal Business Man, who tells Janet and Dick about the Anno Glorii system before Skep Katty and Skepness Man arrive. Skep Katty proclaims that he is a transgender boy, while Skepness Man, after explaining how Anno Glorii came to be, is messaged and taken away by "harmlessExcellence" to her house in Tbilisi, Georgia.
In Tbilisi, Georgia, Janet almost immediately figures out that harmlessExcellence is actually named Violet Beauregarde. In AG 1945, Violet had won a Golden Ticket to go to Willy Wanker's chocolate factory along with four other children, but didn't win the special prize as she "[turned] into a giant blueberry and [had] to be squeezed and [remained] blue for years after". (This does not concern the alternate universe of Intermission 1, in which, instead of Violet, Skepness Man suffered the same fate.) After the events, which led to Charlie Bucket becoming a colleague figure with Willy Wanker, Violet came to found her own candy-making company, Beauregarde Chewing Gum Industry, and kept an eye on Skepness Man, finding the precise moment to adopt him and have him start education at Portal High School. However, on the first day of parenting, Violet chances upon Skepness Man's "time clock" and is taken away to the past.
In Violet's home, Janet and Dick are met by Willy Wanker and Charlie Bucket. Willy and Charlie take Janet and Dick to Portal High School, where Principal Business Man is playing a series of songs, having learned about Violet's origins. Principal Business Man enters the elevator with Willy, Charlie, Janet and Dick, and takes them all away to AG 1945, where they meet up with Violet in her home, back when her past self and her mother had returned from it.
Violet however is quick to escape back to the future, leaving behind her several pieces of Beauregarde Chewing Gum Industry chewing gum. After Principal Business Man hands everyone in the room a chewing gum piece, he gets Janet and Dick back to their own time in Portal High School. However, Principal Business Man inadvertently locks Janet and Dick inside, leaving it up to them to discover the extended underground part of Portal High School, full of resources for survival.
The next morning, Principal Business Man finds Janet and Dick and asks them out of Portal High School. Upon exiting, they, in the city outside, meet up with Skepness Man, who has suffered great changes from being the kid of Violet, and continue walking towards no direction in particular where they find Willy Wanker's factory and are invited inside, where they meet up with Roxa and Jack.
Still the next morning, the four, along with Willy and Charlie, discover that Violet is running a tour of her own chewing gum factory, having invited Skepness Man and the other Golden Ticket winners, Augustus Gloop, Veruca Salt and Mike Teavee. They all immediately join her. In a quite remarkable case of history repeating itself, Augustus ends up drinking Violet's chocolate river, Charlie and Willy leave to suck out blueberry juice from a North Korean, Veruca leaves after being handed a squirrel and a robotic raven by Violet, Mike and "the fake Violet" leave in the Great Glass Elevator, ending up in Willy Wanker's factory, and Janet, Jack, Roxa and Dick become tricksters, populating Violet's candyland with new life. However, they are de-trickstered in the Salt Room and taken by Violet to her house. Violet then briefly leaves and returns with an alternate version of Skepness Man's time clock, which she gives to the four, and the four appear in the time they were originally supposed to be in.
However, their place is unchanged, and they remain in Tbilisi, Georgia, in the distant future. The city was mostly abandoned, and its only remaining citizen is Violet's descendant (in other stories revealed to be Skepness Man's daughter), named Violet Beauregarde, Jr. A museum was also founded in honor of Violet. Thus, Janet and co. charge to Portal Labs, but in the road they encounter District 12, where they are met first by Liudas Vasaris then the Peacekeepers of Critics United. In Portal Labs, they then encounter Wheatly, who doesn't want to lead Janet and co. to the Capitol, and thus, helplessly, Janet and co. return to Portal High School.
Around Portal High School, they then find a flyer, announcing that Taco Warner and Vi Hart are arriving to the city of Portal High School. Principal Business Man also notices the show, and the sequence of events ends up granting Ms. Hart the position of the Music teacher of Portal High School.
Still later, Principal Business Man chances upon the podcast run by the city Welcome to Night Vale and its owner, Cecil. Principal Business Man also meets other guests from the city, namely Carlos and the God Tiers, and chats with them as the seven Fridays in a row begin.
After being separated by Janet and Dick in the underground part of the Arena, Roxa and Jack are found by Sentinel Crane, who promptly injects Roxa and Jack with tribute trackers, making them tributes of the Hunger Games. By abusing time travel and a hole in the electric grid, however, Roxa and Jack find themselves outside of the games, and helpfully enough, all of their blood is sucked out and re-pumped so they no longer have the tribute trackers and can no longer be considered tributes.
After being found by a Capitol citizen trying to report them to Sentinel Crane and seeing him die in a spectacular death, Roxa and Jack move into his house. They however are quickly found by Willy Wanker and Charlie Bucket, who are "a bit lost". They discover that in the future, compared to Willy's own time, his chocolate factory was converted to a Capitol dining area, before going back to Willy's time and experiencing the Chocolate Room for the beauty it is.
After exploring Willy's factory and having quite a few mishaps in it, including Roxa falling into the chocolate river and Skepness Man messaging her, accidentally warranting a Loompa-Oompa servant that he could find Violet, Roxa and Jack exit the factory, where they re-join Janet and Dick.
Dick once again is briefly separated from the group in the future Tbilisi, Georgia. He gets to the museum dedicated to Violet, steals Skepness Man's time clock (the original version), escapes to the past and runs to Portal High School, where he re-joins Janet and co.
Roxa also leaves the group briefly. She comes to the city of Portal High School, where she meets her mother Avril Lavigne, and the two have a heartfelt reunion, before Roxa is put asleep by Cecil's words and, when waking up, meets Janet and co. in Portal High School yet again.
Skepness Man's arcEdit
Skepness Man is originally introduced as a kind of person tying together all the different plots of Spectators of the Host, interviewing them and occasionally slipping to French. However, different Skepness Man arcs quickly pass away as he is found by Violet Beauregarde, who proceeds to take over as his mother and sign him up for Portal High School.
Upon arriving, Skepness Man experiences Portal High School for what it is: Mr. Sanpe has become angry with being demoted from principal to teacher (and still acts as if he is the principal, removing Aranna from the lists) and Principal Business Man has to put up with the school's environment making him dumber. However, a dim light shines as Mr. Lewis, Skepness Man's English teacher, notes that he has the potential to become a polyglot.
Meanwhile, Skepness Man's character quickly changes. He is no longer the chronomad who is really excited to know everything, and even his writing has become "morbid and existential". It is later confirmed that he has become a goth emo, seeing as not even Violet's candyland could cheer him up.
After that, Skepness Man notices that Portal High School has gotten yet another student, namely Chell Junor Roberts. Knowing that Chell Junor is a powerful human, Skepness Man runs away as far as he can when Aranna finds him and insists that perhaps Chell Junor actually loves him.
Skepness Man, Chell Junor and Aranna then proceed to have more encounters. In the second one, Skepness Man is messaged by Lately Pirate, who mocks him, and he still shows signs of paranoia while Chell Junor and Aranna discuss his state and Principal Business Man re-writes Aranna back to the list. The third encounter is seen by Janet and co. and does not feature Aranna or Lately. Skepness Man, for the first time, thinks about the potential of the romance between him and Chell Junor, and Mr. Sanpe interrupts them, expecting responsibility from them.
Still later, Skepness Man and Chell Junor are seen together, exiting Portal High School. Chell Junor, being a powerful human, inadvertently leads Skepness Man to the building of Beauregarde Chewing Gum Industry, where he meets Violet, who had just gotten her doppelganger after losing her. Violet and Skepness Man then discuss how he is her heir apparent, and, after Violet accidentally falls asleep and Skepness Man is left on his own, he decides to lick the spiral sucker in Violet's factory, thus becoming a trickster.
After the events, he is teased by Damned Librarian about being in love with Chell Junor. After several other students' influence, Skepness Man reluctantly admits the romantic affair, which from then on becomes much deeper. However, its effect on Skepness Man's wellbeing is unknown.
Still later, we learn that Chell Junor, prior to the school year's end, is pregnant, setting Principal Business Man off. However, in the Friday after the news Principal Business Man admits a new student, Flashlight Girl, he quickly forgets about the affair between Skepness Man and Chell Junor. Flashlight Girl later attempts talking to Skepness Man, but he puts her off by saying he's taken, and thus she begins reading his works before she is taken away by aliens from the Moon because she misused her flashlight.
Ultimately, Skepness Man and Chell Junor's ongoing romance concludes with their wedding, with Oracle Torrent as the priest. Principal Business Man, having learned about the wedding, prepares for it greatly, and partly due to the influence of the chronomad Aranna, many people come, some of which have never appeared in a MarissaTheWriter fanfic before and some of which have only been mentioned by names.
As per Principal Business Man's plan, the ceremonial part comes first, with Skepness Man and Chell Junor officially being married and given graduation diplomas. Then the party begins, and Janet and co. meet Cecil and Carlos from Welcome to Night Vale, as well as Lately Pirate and Violet.
However, a mishap with a chewing gum piece reveals that Violet was actually Marrissa Roberts all along. Marrissa had come to the past and taken the identity of Violet, while keeping the real Violet trapped in an originally abandoned factory, which later became Beauregarde Chewing Gum Industry. Dissatisfied that Skepness Man wrote Additional Discoveries on Marrissaverse History, Marrissa tries to punch him, but ends up punching Willy Wanker instead, revealing he is really GLaDOS. (Additionally, Charlie Bucket was truly Atlas and P-Body, who appear in this fic as a single guy.)
Marrissa and GLaDOS proceed to have a fight. The fight obliterates Portal High School's above-ground part completely, and within a thin margin, Marrissa wins, having GLaDOS sucked into a black hole which in turn explodes. Marrissa then brings Portal High School from the alternate universe of Intermission 1 and hands the company over to Violet, commenting that "this is the end of an era". Skepness Man, Chell Junor and Violet come to Beauregarde Chewing Gum Industry, while Janet, Jack, Roxa and Dick come to the apartment previously acquired by Roxa and Jack, and the fanfic ends with a quote from the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie, "life had never been sweeter".
While in many parts Aranna gets to be involved in the main plot with the other characters, near the end this formula is changed. Once in a lesson, due to Lately pushing her into the underground part of Portal High School, Aranna finds the time machine that Skepness Man used to own. Because of this, she becomes a chronomad herself, and gets her companions, Flashlight Girl and Cranky Vasquez. The three thus take off on independent and open-ended adventures.
Violet is given several scenes, seemingly separate from the rest of Spectators of the Host but nevertheless taking place in the same universe. In the first one, she arrives at Willy Wanker's factory, where she notices that her doppelganger was stolen by Mike and taken to the factory. Violet thus imprisons her doppelganger once again, but sees that her siblings, Klaus and Sunny M. Beauregardes, have come to rescue her. Using her speshul powers, Violet messes with Klaus and Sunny, and watches the show while drinking blueberry juice. Once she is done, she attempts to teleport them to the city of Welcome to Night Vale, aiming for the dog park, but narrowly misses, and thus Klaus and Sunny are left in the city.
In yet another scene, Violet kidnaps Klaus and Sunny's kids, Faridae and Sacredust Beauregardes. They suspect that something is wrong with Violet, but Violet dismisses the accusations and prepares the two children a living place in her factory. However, due to Violet mishandling her powers, Klaus and Sunny suddenly appear on the scene again, and Violet decided to drop all four of them in Welcome to Night Vale.
After the destruction of the Earth, which brought upon the Third Creation, Cantaloupe and California find that now the Earth is populated by leprechauns who are insistent on calling Cantaloupe and California "Sylph of Space" and "Knight of Time". After a two chapter rivalry that progressively becomes greater and greater, Cantaloupe and California change the landscape of their planet drastically: the Earth is enveloped by a yet newer shell, becoming the Fourth Creation, Cantaloupe and a few surviving leprechauns are living in a floating island not unlike the Minecraft survival map "Skyblock", and California has found himself in Uranus, still trying to get back to Cantaloupe.
- The story has 28 chapters and 3 intermissions, which makes it the longest MarissaTheWriter fanfic. At its own time, it was also the longest fanfic ever written by ASBusinessMagnet, overtaking Portal 2: The Stupidest Sequel of All Time; however, since then, it has become the third longest, being overtaken itself by Calliope's Update Girl - Book One and The Homestuck Character Support Group (Volume 2). In addition, it is also longer than Doombly's longest fanfic, Robert & Rosalind are Dead.
- Chapter 28 was originally published on ASBusinessMagnet's Tumblr on September 26th, 2013, predating Chapters 17 to 27.
- While in the FanFiction.Net version of the story, Intermissions 2 and 3 are put between Chapters 21 and 22, in the version of the story featured in the MarrissaTheWriter Complete Anthology they are put at the very end, after Chapter 28.
- The Complete Anthology also gives an alternate summary to Spectators of the Host, written in the form of the preface to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.